“Someone can be madly in love with you and still not be ready. They can love you in a way you have never been loved and still not join you on the bridge. And whatever their reasons you must leave. Because you never ever have to inspire anyone to meet you on the bridge. You never ever have to convince someone to do the work to be ready. There is more extraordinary love, more love that you have never seen, out here in this wide and wild universe. And there is the love that will be ready.” -NayyirahWaheed
I am eating cake for breakfast. It pairs like perfection with coffee, which has now become a daily habit in my Seattle lifestyle. I have no shame, sitting on the front porch in my pajamas as the rain falls on the 3rd grey day in a row this week. I think the whole endless summer we thought we were enjoying is coming to a foreseeable close. But as of late the good things seem to out weigh the bad; maybe the rain has helped me wash away a few things. It has most definitively forced me to appreciate the random rays of sunlight playing peek-a-boo from time to time. But its Friday folks and regardless if your week has been kick ass or a bummer of sorts, you survived another week on this crazy little globe circling a giant fireball. And all of us deserve some extreme kudos for that. So fuck it, eat some cake for breakfast. Keep on embracing all the joys this week has brought you, and forget the rest.
“You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.”
“Break clear away, once in awhile and climb a mountain or spend a week in the woods. Wash your spirit clean.”
It is Friday night, I am in a hotel room in Missoula, Montana, but at this point the day of the week has become irrelevant. It has been just over two weeks since I left sunny Florida (which I hear these days is more like a monsoon). The mileage count for the trek has gone beyond 3,500miles. These, I suppose, are all ways to quantify the journey but honestly time is such a fickle concept. The past two weeks have been so much more than just fourteen 24hour days. I do not even know where to start explaining what this time has been to me or better said, done to me. A few days have been filled with cornfields, podcast, and jam sessions as the mile markers on the road passed by. Others have been filled with friends in a familiar place but a new season. Park City summers do seem pretty sweet. Most recently though, the Teton’s! My goodness everyone should lay eyes on those mountains at some point in their lives. They erupt from the ground with such a rugged and dramatic manner. I took one day to get up close and personal with them deciding on a 12.4mile hike with a 2,900ft elevation increase. I do not think I knew what I was in store for when I set out on the hike. Growing up in a state barely above sea level leaves you kind of clueless to adventures like that. It was entirely doable. Not to say there weren’t moments when I thought I had hiked far enough and contemplated turning around. But I didn’t. And as some of the steps became a challenge I looked around myself, slowly rising higher and getting closer to the beauty of those mountains. It reminded me of what living should feel like. You work hard, everything around you is beautiful, and you feel so alive. It served as a welcome reminder of how capable I am all by myself. And how nice it is to move at your own pace and enjoy something uninterrupted, entirely for yourself. Completing the hike made me extremely proud of myself, a feeling that has been lacking too much in my life lately.
These past two weeks have already started to change me. It has reminded me what the point of everyday truly is and that I am making the right choice for myself. I can’t wait for what the days ahead have in store but so far so good in this new chapter. The photos don’t quite do justice to the experience.
“…What you feel in the presence of a thing you admire is just one word – ‘yes.’ The
affirmation, the acceptance, the sign of admittance. And that ‘Yes’ is more than an
answer to one thing, it’s a kind of ‘Amen’ to life, to the earth that holds this thing,
to the thought that created it, to yourself for being able to see it. But the ability to
say ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ is the essence of all ownership. It’s your ownership of your
function – the act of valuing. ‘Yes’ or ‘No’, ‘I wish’ or ‘I do not wish.’ You can’t say
‘Yes’ without saying ‘I.’ There is no affirmation with out the one who affirms. In
this sense, everything to which you grant your love is yours.”